Image via Complex Original
UFC 135 Preview: Jon Jones - Champ or Chump?
UFC 135 is a coming of age tale. Is Jon Jones everything everyone says he is? Rampage Jackson will ask that question with his fists.
I went 3-2 for UFC 133 and 4-1 for UFC 134 but I'm nervous about my picks for this card. The match-ups are explosive so anything can happen. But uncertainty in sports is what makes it entertaining. Order the fights
By Orlando Lima @limachips who will be tweeting the event from @complex_sports at 9pm
Props to Cage Potato for this hilarious Rampage GIF gallery. I'm still laughing!
Ben Rothwell vs Mark Hunt
Ben Rothwell vs Mark "Super Samoan" Hunt
Reminds Us Of: "Bum Fights" — if bums were well-fed dudes with big hands. It won't be technical but it will be entertaining.
Inside Scoop, Rothwell: Last time I saw this guy was two years ago when Cain Velasquez beat him unmercifully about the body and face until the ref stopped the fight. Since then, he's earned one victory (a decision) over Gilbert Yvel. Not impressive.
Inside Scoop, Hunt: His record is 6-7. What more needs to be said? He's done some things in his career but he's not an elite fighter.
Prediction: Rothwell. At least he has a winning record. He's susceptible to knock outs but Hunt's equally susceptible to submissions. Rothwell passes Hunt's matador take-down defense and finishes him on the ground. Most likely it ends with strikes but there's a slim chance Rothwell pulls off a submission.
Nate Diaz vs Takanori Gomi
Nate Diaz vs "The Fireball Kid" Takanori Gomi
Comedic Backstory: Nate's big brother, Nick, got 420 problems but Gomi ain't one. He did this to the Fireball Kid a few fights back before pissing positive for massive amounts of weed.
Inside Scoop, Diaz: He's got heart and submissions but he's short on KO power. He pops more shit than a newborn show pony because he can pull off submissions like this. He's 2-2 in his last four fights due to an unsuccessful attempt to move up a weight class. *Paging GSP. Middleweight's calling. It's unclear why it's going straight to voicemail* Now, Nate's back at lightweight with a lot to prove.
Inside Scoop, Gomi: The Fireball Kid came to the UFC highly-touted for his striking only to lose two of his three matches by submission. First to Kenny Florian, then to Clay Guida. He has power in his hands but he gases easily.
Prediction: Diaz. Stockton, CA, punk! Diaz gets props for his trash talk because unlike, say, Floyd Mayweather, Diaz loves to be the aggressor and make the fight. In this one, he peppers Gomi with strikes (and epithets) while avoiding big blows. Gomi wears down (again) and gets submitted.
This is a prime candidate for submission of the night. If you don't think Nate will try to top his brother's Gomi gogoplata, you need to back away from the vaporizer, homes.
Travis Browne vs Rob Broughton
Travis "Hapa" Browne vs Rob "The Bear" Broughton
Better Nickname: Hapa is Hawaiian slang for a person who's half Asian, half Pacific Islander. A bear is my hairy gay friend... or Teddy Ruxpin. Either way, I'm taking Hapa for originality.
Inside Scoop, Browne: He's one of the biggest humans you'll ever see and his 5" height advantage here translates to a significant reach advantage. His last three fights have lasted 52 seconds combined. Don't get up for a Tecate once Hapa steps in the octagon.
Inside Scoop, Broughton: He's a well-rounded guy from England who made his money welding before he switched to beating people up. He's soft in the midsection and he's only had one prior UFC fight—which he won by submission.
Prediction: Browne. It would be easier to get Rick Ross on a vegetarian diet than to take Browne down. Broughton doesn't have the wrestling skills for that. It's a stand up war and once Browne lays those meat hooks on Broughton it's like Vanessa Williams said in New Jack City, "Rock-a-bye, baby."
This is a good pick for KO of the night.
Matt Hughes vs Josh Koscheck
Matt Hughes vs Josh "Kos" Koscheck
Worse Cauliflower Ears: Both these guys are world class wrestlers with hundreds of matches between them. Their ears are shot. Koscheck's ears are twisted but Hughes looks like he's got a Cabbage Patch Kid hanging off each side of his face. Hughes wins... by a crinkle.
Inside Scoop, Hughes: This guy is a living legend. The only knock on him is—sing it with me—"The ol' grey mule just ain't what she used to be..." He's fought almost 60 fights. It happens.
Inside Scoop, Koscheck: In selling his fight against GSP Koscheck took on the villain role and came off looking like that meathead bully everyone wants to see catch a beating. For his troubles, GSP closed up his eye with five rounds of stiff jabs. But Koscheck can wrestle, his stand-up is always improving, and he's looking for redemption.
Prediction: Koscheck. This is one of those fights where the guys have similar skill sets but one guy is a lot older than the other. I've said it before and I'll say it again: when you get old, the chin is the first thing to go. We saw that in Hughes' last fight against B.J. Penn. KO-ed quick fast.
Koscheck has a big overhand right. He uses it and drops Hughes... who then retires. A tip of the hat to Illinois' second favorite son. At one point in time, Hughes was unbeatable.
Jon Jones vs Rampage Jackson
Jon "Bones" Jones vs Rampage Jackson
Pre-Fight Hype: Rampage has been trying to get in Jones' head with chatter that Jones planted a mole in his camp. When the topic came up in an interview last Saturday, Jones was annoyed. There's mega hype on Jones. The pressure to deliver a great performance in his first title defense is tremendous.
Inside Scoop, Jones: If B.J. Penn wasn't already nicknamed the Prodigy, that moniker would be perfect for Jones. He's the youngest UFC champ ever. His one loss is from a bogus DQ. His wrestling is from Paris and his striking is from Blade 2... if Blade 2 were made in 2051. No opponent has been able to touch him.
Inside Scoop, Jackson: Rampage cocks the hammer. His ability to knock you out with one punch means he's always dangerous. But Rampage hasn't checked a leg kick since the last time Rep. Joe Walsh paid child support—yeah, it's been that long—and that's made his entire attack less effective.
Prediction: Jones. It's hard to imagine Rampage getting in a position to deliver a devastating blow. Jones studied Jackson's suspect performances against Griffin and Evans, and gives Rampage a super-sized combo meal of leg kicks and takedowns.
Going out on a limb here... Jones chokes out Jackson on the ground. Rampage doesn't tap. The kid is legit.