Toward the middle of his new Drake diss track, “Euphoria,” Kendrick Lamar describes their conflict as a “friendly fade” that shouldn’t go further than a respectful sparring match. But listening to the whole song, it’s clear Kendrick isn’t interested in being cordial.
“Euphoria” is an epic diatribe of a song that’s as scorching as it is lengthy. Over the course of six minutes, Kendrick lays bare virtually every negative thought anyone has ever had about the Toronto rapper. But you know, the internet loves to gas shit, and with Stans mucking things up, it can be difficult to tell what’s what. But we got you.
Today, we score Kendrick’s Drake diss based on bars (10 points), presentation (10 points), song quality (10 points), and overall effectiveness (10 points).
Toward the middle of his new Drake diss track, “Euphoria,” Kendrick Lamar describes their conflict as a “friendly fade” that shouldn’t go further than a respectful sparring match. But listening to the whole song, it’s clear Kendrick isn’t interested in being cordial.
“Euphoria” is an epic diatribe of a song that’s as scorching as it is lengthy. Over the course of six minutes, Kendrick lays bare virtually every negative thought anyone has ever had about the Toronto rapper. But you know, the internet loves to gas shit, and with Stans mucking things up, it can be difficult to tell what’s what. But we got you.
Today, we score Kendrick’s Drake diss based on bars (10 points), presentation (10 points), song quality (10 points), and overall effectiveness (10 points).
The Bars:
Checking in at six minutes, “Euphoria” is an exercise in saying a lot with a lot. Kendrick scoops up a full range of Drake jokes, buffet style, skillfully piling insults atop one another in a gluttonous overflow. In one section, Kendrick reminds listeners that Drake caught the fade from Diddy, a disgraced rap icon who’s almost old enough to be Drake’s father. In another, he pokes fun at rumors of Drake’s abdominal etching, threading it with slick wordplay as he takes a jab at his perceived lack of a classic album: “Yeah, my first one like my last one, it's a classic, you don't have one/ Let your core audience stomach that/ Then tell 'em where you get your abs from.”
Elsewhere, Kendrick puts a cutting twist on otherwise flavorless ghostwriting allegations against the Toronto rapper. Citing Drake’s line about being in a “20-v-one,” he raps: “Ain't 20-v-one, it's one-v-20 if I gotta smack niggas that write with you.” It’s a barb that repurposes a Drake lyric for an epic body shot; think Goku getting Frieza to slice himself in half with his own energy disc.
When Kendrick’s not joking about Drake’s alleged ghostwriting, he’s aiming at the Grammy winner’s imagined racial identity crises. And when he’s not doing that, he’s calling him an irresponsible culture vulture. He even takes time to throw jabs at Drake for coming at Pharrell instead of Pusha-T. While the syntax can be a tad sloppy, and some of the jokes are shamelessly sophomoric, he’s usually succinct and, given how long some of these Drake criticisms have been around, surprisingly inventive. Sure, Kendrick let off a lot of shots, and his aim wasn’t always perfect, but those aren’t problems when they hit the target in all the right spots.
Score: 8.5/10
The Presentation:
From the cover art to the timing, everything about “Euphoria” feels deliberate and impactful, a far cry from Drake’s flubbed release for “Push Ups.” The messaging here is consistent, the theatrics are compelling, and the execution is electric. It all begins with the title itself. It’s likely a nod to Drake’s role as an executive producer for HBO’s Euphoria, a show that’s been accused of oversexualizing teenagers. While he hasn’t been hit with any formal accusations, there have long been internet rumors about Drake trying to date teenagers, so this only funnels folks back to that point. Also, considering that people are continually searching for intel about a potential Euphoria Season 3, it’s both an implicit jab and an SEO boon for Kung-Fu Kenny, basically adding another layer to the self-sustaining promo machine that is his Drake diss.
Kendrick also gets some points for what he didn’t do for this rollout. His scarcity made his verse on Future & Metro Boomin’s “Like That” that much more impactful. Rather than trying to match Drake’s admittedly funny Instagram theatrics, he sat in silence as he put together his ultimate weapon and waited for the proper time to strike. It was on streaming services within an hour of its initial release. This only embedded “Euphoria” with a layer of decisiveness that the rollout for “Push Ups” simply didn’t have. The rollout for the former left people thinking Drake “leaked” the track so he could see whether people thought it was good enough to release. “Euphoria” is tethered to no such narrative; this was all part of the plan. He had Drake right where he wanted him.
Score: 9/10
The Disrespect:
As Ice Cube and Tupac Shakur showed us years ago, disrespect is a must for any rapper’s diss song utility belt. For “Euphoria,” Kendrick disrespected early and often, using a combination of sly condescension, audacity, and plainly stated hatred to maim and belittle Drake every step of the way. Here, he brings up reports that Drake got his ass beat by an old man and pokes fun at Drake’s perceived racial insecurities, ghostwriting rumors, and whispers of plastic surgery. And that’s only half of it.
The tonal inflections and phrasing here only enhance the effect. When Kendrick raps, “I like Drake with the melodies, I don't like Drake when he act tough,” his lecturey delivery sounds like a big brother who’s genuinely disappointed in his little brother for falling in with the wrong crowd. When he mentions liking “Back to Back,” he really sounds like he likes it. It’s a shapeshifting performance that oscillates between searing hate and playful dismissiveness, all creating a level of disrespect that colors the best diss songs.
Score: 9/10
The Song:
When I broke down “Push Ups” versus “Like That,” I explained that the former was the better “diss song” and the latter was the better overall “song” in a vacuum. This is a case of the reverse, with Kendrick’s frenzied delivery, cartoonish inflections, bouts of meandering and sonic hyperactivity making it all a little too busy to throw on in the club. Seriously, run this through an Eminem AI filter and people would say it’s “scaring the hoes.” The production doesn’t do it any favors, either. The sounds here are so colorless that the beat switches don’t even manage to be compelling, and they actually halt some of the song’s momentum, rendering it a series of clunky start and stops. As a diss song, the track is so scathing and so animated, it’s got no choice but to be indelible. But as a whole, “Euphoria” is a goofy, impractical adventure that’s really only good at the thing it was created for: tearing Drake’s head off. It does that, but it’s not the easiest thing to nod your head to.
Score: 6.5/10
The Effectiveness:
Forged in internet discourse, pettiness, and theatricality, “Euphoria” is, as a diss song, a masterclass. While some people will dock Kendrick for regurgitating Drake insults that people have already made, his decision to cast a wide net ensured the song’s place in the zeitgeist. “Euphoria” encompasses so many points that it could damn well be a Rorasach test for how and why anyone doesn’t like Aubrey Drake Graham.
While it didn’t land with the same explosive force as a “Story of Adidon,” the quality of the bars and the delivery (as well as the relevance of the subject matter) helped make Kendrick a trending topic on multiple fronts. The official audio video release for the track has collected more than 7 million views in just one day. Kendrick’s words have sparked a flurry of petty Drake insults as much as they’ve sparked sociological debates about race and ethnic identity in America. As cliché as it might feel to say, Drake has proven that he’s a master of moving the club. “Euphoria” proves that Kendrick is still the best at moving the culture.
Score: 9/10
It’s a bit too sprawling for its own good and the beat is kinda mid, but ultimately, “Euphoria” offers a potent mix of skill, viciousness, and humor that would be hard for anyone to overcome. Now, we’ll get the pleasure of watching Drake try.
Final score: 42/50